There’s no time to waste with Tip #3…
The opposite of great is good, and we’ll never hit “best” if we settle for “easy”! When it comes to ensuring that our Christmas season is peaceful, joyful, and (mostly) stress-free, the greatest tool in our arsenal is the ability to say a well-placed NO.
The fast-paced nature of our culture as a whole has the ability to push us into quick, easy decisions that don’t fit our family’s goals and standards. Christmas, perhaps more than any other time of the year, really has that potential. We’re handed so many opportunities for how we will spend our time and money that it’s enough to make an overwhelmed parent’s head spin.
Although it’s definitely easy to say YES to every opportunity that comes our way, to do so is never in the best interest of our children’s well-being and our own mental health. The wise parent “Sees the danger that lays ahead” (Proverbs 27:12) and constructs a plan to avoid being caught up in the busyness trap of the holidays. Here are some helpful ideas to avoid the regret that comes from too many “yes” decisions that haven’t been weighed carefully to determine their impact on your family.
When it comes to extra opportunities and outings…
- As a family, take out your calendar and (in pencil) write down every upcoming activity in December. After recording these activities, take a careful look at the month as a whole. If there is no downtime for your family or just too many days out and running about (especially for your youngest children), go through the activities you’ve recorded and decide which of them can be eliminated. Just because an outing is available doesn’t mean that it’s the right choice for your family this year. Eliminate those activities that are “good” in favor of the activities that are “great!”
- * Here’s some good news… Each year is a different season of growth for your family. Some activities that sound oh-so-fun but that aren’t right for your family this year may be the perfect opportunity next year!
When it comes to buying gifts…
- Although it would be fun to buy our kids everything they ask for, wisdom says that to do so would be harmful to their character. Coveting has been around since the Garden of Eden. It is an inevitable truth that the more we over-indulge our children, the more they will covet. When coveting appears, gratitude is almost non-existent.
The first year that we were finally financially able to buy our children more gifts was a real eye-opener for us. Instead of opening a gift and being excited about what they’d received, our children just ripped into one package after another, never stopping to appreciate the gift or the giver. We were stunned by their behavior. Up to that point, all of our children had been characterized by thankfulness for everything they received. However, with an overabundance of gifts came an overabundance of greed.
- There are many ways to make Christmas special without flooding our kids with endless packages. After the above-mentioned Christmas debacle, we began buying each child a book, pajamas, stocking stuffers, one toy, and a family gift. We purchased family gifts like a foosball table, ping-pong table, box of audiobooks, and one year, we split it into boys and girls, with the girls getting a trunk of dress-up clothes that I had purchased at the Thrift store throughout the year. I also gave them my wedding dress and veil. (Even then, I was confident none of them would want to wear it as a young bride) One of my daughters wore that wedding dress each day as she homeschooled!
I know other families that buy four presents: something to read, something to wear, something to play with, and something they need. Use your imagination and determine what works best for your family.
When it comes to spending money:
- It is never a “good” decision to spend more money than we have to buy Christmas presents! Although it may seem joyful for the moment, when the credit card bill arrives in January, all of that joy will be sucked right out of us! Have an honest conversation with your family. It is so good for our kids to see that just because we “want” something doesn’t mean that we neglect our responsibility to be wise with our money.
This may be an unpopular opinion, but I don’t think it’s healthy for parents to skip buying presents for one another in favor of buying more for the children. Our families are a team, and it’s a great lesson for our kids to see that every team member gets to both give and receive. Seeing their parents hand one another lovingly chosen gifts will make our children’s hearts feel secure. Trust me, their security is worth more than any store-bought gift!
If we allow it, good will become the mortal enemy of great. Fight the battle! Determine what the “great” decisions will be for your family. Not everyone will applaud your decisions… That’s ok. Making some hard choices to protect your family’s peace and joy will pay greater dividends than any holiday outing or gift.
Megan Scheibner 